Breathe
By Soledad Durazo
If you are expecting to read a tragedy, I warn you that you are not going to find it here.
About a year ago I went for a gynecological consultation, which in theory is annual. The doctor ordered the battery of tests that at my age -56 years old- are usually requested.
Among other things, he asked me for a follow-up mammogram. Three breast fibroadenomas have been removed over the past 30 years. All benign.
I let several months go by postponing the exams.
At the beginning of this year, as general editor of Opinion 51, I was fortunate to receive for five consecutive weeks a column in which Zoé told us little by little about her experience as a breast cancer patient; we lived with her the whole process from detection, treatment and outcome.
Every week that her text arrived in my mailbox I remembered the pending I had with my exams; I felt incongruous and at the same time a commitment was born with that story and I always thanked that woman that without knowing it, she was pushing me to take the exams, but I kept letting the days go by.
In addition, on the occasion of my birthday at the end of February, a person very close to my life urged me: do it for yourself and for those who love you.
These two messages from the universe led me to take what for me was the "routine" step.
You can imagine the outcome.
Contrary to what had happened on previous occasions, this time the result was different; repeat the mammogram to obtain other cuts and then the instruction: talk to your gynecologist as soon as possible, do not let much time pass.
Indeed, the doctor asked me for an ultrasound and biopsy with a sense of urgency.
While all this was going on I decided not to share it with anyone so as not to set off alarms before the time, except for my make-up artist who heard the call from the lab asking for more tests and detected that something strange was going on.
I shared it with my closest friends and family days before the biopsy appointment.
Three days earlier, when the doctor performed the ultrasound with extraordinary sensitivity, he warned me that in his experience there was a 95% chance that the result was cancer.
The word is strong; I remember that moment as a kind of suspension of time and then suddenly the reality and the need to do whatever is necessary NOW.
Then he told me: let's focus on that 5% chance of it being negative and, second key expression from the doctor: feel blessed, if there was a better time to find a finding, we would always wish it was this one because we are so close to the time.
With that in mind came the days of waiting, already with the accompaniment of my closest ones and family. Time passed slowly, I filled pages of the notebook writing the word "negative" to attract that result. It had no effect.
Then came the consultations, more tests and the surgery to remove the breast and with it, throw away the infected body part.
The removal of the first bandage to assume the change in your body and start living with the new physiognomy was relatively easy and I believe that my support network played a very important role in this, as they naturally did my healings and changed the bandages.
Recovery from surgery, more consultations, more tests and then start chemotherapy sessions.
Recently on a flight I realized that I have not put a face to cancer. What does it look like? I asked myself without putting much effort in finding the "figure" because it is unpleasant to assume that it once inhabited your body.
To date, I have had five chemotherapy sessions. Good days, some of them regular. The ugliest ones I just try to keep one thing in mind: every minute that passes brings me closer to the end of this process and that I am an extremely fortunate person who is living this reality in better circumstances than unfortunately many women find themselves in.
It has been a time of much learning. Revaluing life and those who fortunately accompany you in it. Receiving the accompaniment, support and affection of so many people who genuinely express their good wishes and seek to bring you information and remedies with the best of intentions.
That is why I warned that you will not find a tragedy here. The circumstances in which I live are fortunate. Cancer can be cured, cancer is not synonymous with death, cancer detected in time is an opportunity for life.
If you are a woman, do not fail to take the exams; if you have a woman next to you, urge her to do so.
The opinions expressed are the responsibility of the authors and are absolutely independent of the position and editorial line of the company. Opinion 51.
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