Breathe
By Aidee Zamorano
I thought that my dream of doing a master's degree outside of Mexico would be easier in a European country, but no. I was told at my son's school that it is a crime for the oldest (12 years old) to accompany the youngest (8) after school. At my son's school they told me that it is a crime for the oldest (12 years old) to accompany the youngest (8 years old) after school and that puts my continuity in school at risk. I gave up a part-time job for the same reason.
In Spain there is no law explicitly prohibiting children from walking alone after school. However, Article 229 of the Penal Code states that persons responsible for the care of a minor may face prison sentences if they abandon the child or fail to provide the necessary care to ensure the child's safety.
The law does not establish a minimum age for minors to walk alone on the street, but leaves the responsibility in the hands of parents or guardians. Although there is no rule prohibiting it, it is recommended that children under 12 should not go to school alone, although, as with everything in parenting, the decision depends on each family context and the child's level of autonomy. This lack of legal clarity once again places the burden on the shoulders of families, who must balance social expectations, work realities and the safety of minors without clear support from the system. Yes, there is no gender perspective in the laws here either. Surprise!
On the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women, I want to bring to the table a type of violence that we don't always recognize: the structural violence we caregivers face in the workplace (and academia). It is not visible to the naked eye, but it is felt in the lack of opportunities for growth that never come, in the "I had to put my work on hold, I had to drop out of school" and in the disproportionate burden of caregiving, which seems designed to always fall on us. Let's not fool ourselves, the personal is political and that you and I have to make sacrifices is part of a system that is not designed with care at the center. We need a new social contract.
Moms don't choose to stop working. It is the system that forces us to leave.
Every day, thousands of women face working conditions that do not consider our realities. Inflexible schedules, the absence of adequate leave and the lack of co-responsibility policies leave us trapped in a circle where choosing between working or caring is not really a choice, but an imposition.
In Mexico, women's labor force participation barely exceeds 45%, compared to 77% for men. In Spain, although 71% of women are active in the labor market, the employment rate plummets as the number of children increases. For example, only 52% of mothers with three or more children under the age of 12 work, compared to 81% of fathers in the same situation. And if we add to this the average age at which children are born -27.7 years in Mexico and 31.5 in Spain- it is clear that motherhood is closely linked to exclusion from the labor market.
Loving, caring and mothering are not the same thing
Let's be clear: loving and mothering are deeply personal decisions, while caring is a job. It is physical, emotional and mental effort that sustains not only our families, but the economy as a whole. However, this work is not paid, it is not valued and, even worse, it is taken for granted that we must assume it in solitude. For weeks I have been seeing a woman walking near my apartment carrying a newborn baby girl with a lost look in her eyes, soon I am going to talk to her.
Care work has economic value, in Mexico, it represents 24% of the Gross Domestic Product (GDP), more than double what the manufacturing industry contributes - and I can swear it is much heavier than when I had 100% face-to-face jobs in the automotive industry. In Spain, unpaid care work is equivalent to 22% of GDP, which is more than industries such as commerce and construction combined. These figures reveal that without care work, economies would collapse, but even so, this effort remains invisible and undervalued.
When care is not recognized as a collective responsibility and a human right, it perpetuates a system that condemns us to poverty. Thus, moms end up carrying double or triple shifts, with lower wages and no access to a decent future. And when we can't sustain that pace, we are simply pushed out and made to believe that it's our fault, that we can't, that we didn't do enough yoga or we don't vibrate high because the opportunities are there, but we don't want to take them.
Starts Daniela Romo's music from the year I was born: 1983
Hey Claudia:
- Tell me why do you always tell me only lies?
Mexico's 2025 Proposed Federal Expenditure Budget (PEF) allocates 44.87 billion pesos to care-related programs. This figure represents approximately 0.7% of total programmable spending. According to the Center for Economic and Budgetary Research (CIEP), this allocation is 27% lower in real terms compared to what was allocated in 2016.
- Tell me why don't you ever tell the truth? You're playing with my feelings, I can't go on like this.
Co-responsibility is not a concession, it is a right.
The solution can no longer fall to us alone. Companies must take an active role in creating fairer workplaces, where co-responsibility is not an exception, but the norm. We have proven it with the Mamá Godín Ranking: when policies that promote decent work for mothers -and for any caregiver, including men- are integrated, the labor participation of mothers can increase by up to 113%, as has happened in some companies in Mexico that follow the methodology I developed in 2020.
But the efforts of a few pioneering companies are not enough. Governments must guarantee universal, accessible and quality care systems. We can no longer depend on "luck" to find a place where our dual role as workers and caregivers is respected.
This 25N, let us reflect on the violence that women face beyond private spaces. Because the lack of options to care, work and live with dignity is also a form of violence. Caring is working, and working should not mean giving up our rights or our future.
And since we can't go on like this: Alma Paz (La de RH) and I invite you to our contingent of moms and women caregivers in Madrid to raise our voices for those who care, work and study. We will gather to make visible the inequalities we face and demand that care work be recognized and protected here and there.
📍 Meeting point: Office of Social and Family Policies, Paseo de la Chopera 41, Madrid.⏰ Time: 6:00 pm.
Bring something purple and your energy to march together for a more just future, we are waiting for you!
The opinions expressed are the responsibility of the authors and are absolutely independent of the position and editorial line of the company. Opinion 51.
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